What happened at Work Today

1. I realised that after the 1527th signature on the 483rd document my signature actually looks good!

2. HR personnel have beautiful e-mail id's and extension numbers.

3. The coffee dispenser actually dispenses coffee. All you need to do it go around it a couple of times. Look from the right, then from the left, then from the top, towards the wall and so on. Finally after 8 odd minutes request someone to show you how it works - and you know what, it actually works!

4. Bruised my ego, near the coffee dispenser.
X: So, what process are you with?
Me: Err... process?
X: Yeah, process.
Then realising she was a BPO employee, I said more to myself than to her "Oh, you're with the BPO"
X: Yeah, this entire building is the BPO building.
Me: (Walking away) No, I'm with technologies.
Damn the buggers, that was *our* building, for Pete's sake!

5. Checked out the gym. No comments.

On the positive side, we can wear casuals each and every day of the week.
On the negative side, there are no cute guys in our batch. I think that company - Mathematics - down the road that did recruit a couple of really *cute* fellows from the 2002 pass-outs probably recruited all the cute ones this year also :(

That's about it. They call me "Project Engineer", I guess I'll get used to it.

d e j e c t i o n

1. Ever since I joined engineering in a private engineering college in Pune I was so positive my degree isn't going to be worth even the paper it's printed on. The belief grows stronger by the minute.

2. 62 hours and 10 odd minutes before I'm scheduled to be a part of the software industry that hires so called engineers at whole sale quantities, I'm pretty sure this is not what I really want to do in life. For the past couple of days it was just maybe-maybenot. Now I'm so bloody positive. Damn... no use even swearing now, its too early for that!?!!!!

P.S: Don't swear at the engineers at blogger. Comments have been intentionally disabled for this post.

P.P.S: My firefox keeps performing illeagal operations. I don't even know who to swear at!

P.P.P.S: Thank You for your patience.

Micro Story #3

Whatever

She sat there. Just there. Typing. Staring. Pretending to type. Copy. Cut. Paste. Undo. Redo. Undo Again. Redo Again. Cut. Cut. Cut. Select All. Delete. Undo. Redo. Once again, a blank screen. No foundation, only floating ideas. "Writer's block", she thought. She sat with one leg on the chair next to hers and one on the floor. "How're you sitting", someone asked her. She dismissed the question with a nod. In five seconds she even forgot someone spoke to her. She was still thinking, "Writer's block".

She saw her sister. Reading out loud. What she really wanted at that time was to pack her in a bag and dump her down the balcony. The sister was after all - nothing more than - in the words of Douglas Adams "a carbon-based bipedal life form descended from an ape", and to carry on in the same vein with due respect to the original author - more specifically she was 14, hyperactive, over curious and down right irritating.

Yeah, Whatever.

Tagged Again!

The second Tag, if you ignore the coffee tag I was trying to pass around.
And since I am awake since 4 a.m. with nothing particular to do other than trying to reduce my unread mails from a number my calculator refuses to convert to binary to a number I could count on my fingers. But I said, "trying", and it's not a very successful attempt.

That besides, here goes -

Seven things you plan to do before you die:

I had many times compiled those lists 100-things-I'd-like-to-do-before-I-die types, and every time I see something new I want to do that also. However, in no particular order and definitely not in priority -

1. Bungee Jump, White water raft, sail around the world.
2. Design my own house - the complete architecture, interiors, the works.
3. Get myself my own private beach in some exotic island.
4. Get a private pilot lisence and my own little aircraft.
5. Drive a F1 car and race in a couple of off-road rallies.
6. Write(?) a photo-book (Sorry people, can't comeup with a better statement.)
7. Run a marathon.

Seven things you can do:

1. Jog for 30-mins/5.5 km. (I know Anil Ambani does more, but this is about *I can*)
2. Read Atlas Shrugged in 5 hours.
3. Ride my scooty at 70 kph when i'ts supposed to do a max of 60kph. (And screw my engine in the process, but that's secondary)
4. Bullshit my way through 4 years of engineering. (Genuinely not knowing anything)
5. Talk incessantly.
6. Laugh without there being any reason to laugh. (People also call it abnormal behaviour, please ignore them)
7. Wake up at weird hours and have nothing to do.

Seven things you can't do:

1. Resist Bakers Basket Chocolate Cake. (Or anything classified under *temptation*, but then that's the whole point, temptation is not to be resisted... well, whatever)
2. Study. (I haven't done that in my entire life. Will do it one day though... err... should this have been in one of the categories above??? )
3. Sing. (!)
4. Understand the whole idea behind heavy metal. And understand why is heavy metal classified as music.
5. Buy roses of a colour other than red (!!!)
6. Sit in one place for over a few minutes without standing up/walking/fidgeting/etc.
7. Bear people who as per my self-inflated bloody dumb arse ideas of superiority aren't up to my mark.

Seven things you say the most:

1. I swear a lot so a lot of assorted swear words.
2. She/He is so hilarious. (I find a lot of people funny and hilarious)
3. I think the road's going to screw my shock absorbers and the suspension. (I'm too bloody over-protective of my car)
4. Excuse Me?
5. Yeah, whatever.
6. Please, pretty please.
7. Ankita if you *insert something my sister does* again, I'll pack you in a bag and dump you down the balcony!

Seven things that attract you about the opposite sex:

1. Smile.
2. A sense of humour.
3. Self Respect.
4. Intelligence.
5. Big hands. (I have never figured this out myself)
6. Full sleeved Shirts (Ummm... never mind)
7. Powerful Cars (Whatever... yeah... wong category? Well... umm... Hmmm... Drop it)
Thank goodness 7 are done, because that's about all I'm disclosing on a public forum!

Seven Celebrity Crushes:

Seven... okay, so seven off my head. Don't sue me if I change the list tomorrow!

1. Shah Rukh Khan.
2. Abhishek Bacchan.
3. Joey Tribbiani and Chandler Bing. (Yes, the characters and not really the people)
4. Bon Jovi.
5. Benjamin Bratt.
6. Valentino Rossi.
7. I even thought Ralph Schumacher was pretty *cute* when I used to be 17, and then there was Eddie Irvine... how I miss that character!

Seven People I'd like to tag:

Mathi boy's been tagging some of the the people I'd like to tag, but I'll still re-tag them :D

1. Danny
2. Akshay
3. Charlie
4. Pearl
5. Maximum Dilemma

And any one who'd like to pick this up!

bulb-illuminated-in-my-head #2

The funniest and clever*est* of jokes is lost if the audience doesn't understand the joke.

Its worse if they don't realise that there was a joke at all ;)

God Bless Godse Bakshi!

And all other local authors on planet earth. Though Godse-Bakshi-Katre specifically because I remember them on almost all the books I ever had in 4 years.

And god bless the purple cover thin book's author who wrote that wonderful book on MPS.
And god bless the guy who wrote that awesome 100 pages book on RMT.

And god get me a life.
Writing this when I can be doing much better things!

Dedicated to my teachers, with love!

I'm an engineer today because I had some really awesome people to teach me over the last 4 years. Chances are none of them are going to come across this, but this one's for them. Thank You Teachers, thank you for the last 4 years of my life!